POTSHOTS from MANILA
By Sonny Pucio
Mirasol
Sen. Pimentel tells us GMA benefited from kumpare and alleged
jueteng king Bong Pineda, although he has no proof. Without proof,
no one will tumble, mighty or humble, pint size or otherwise.
Who else, aside from Bong, give out alleged tong?
Will the Senate committee on games’ investigation be another
porcine “Hog the Limelight” episode? (They even have a committee
for their games?)
The committee chairman, ex-actor Lito Lapid, is mere airman, no
rare man. Without script or director, does he scurry to a
directory?
Who are in the Horror Roll of payola-givers and recipients? Can
Lapid & Co. dig this out without fear of premature Lapida?
A Lapid son , Mark, is said to have been elected governor of
Pampanga under the auspices of the jueteng king, who makes or
breaks political careers in GMA’s home province. Can the probe
then hit the mark?
I used to love GMA . . . GMA-7, that is.
A scandal in the Quirino administration involved his orinola; now
its payola, and the stench reaches Angola. Oh, my lola and her
camisola!
The winds of scandal are making Arroyo swing like a yo-yo.
Erap must be dancing with glee among his pet ducks in Tanay. Oh,
my nanay, the scandal he couldn’t duck is now bedeviling Pandak &
Co., whose duck, I mean goose, may soon go like Peking duck.
GMA avowed to 20 evangelical bishops that she doesn’t get payola,
Bishop’s gambit?
Max Soliven of Philippine Star wrote that PGMA must be feared for
her to be able to stop jueteng. Is fear of presidents subject to
height?
But, yes, indeed, GMA must grow to a higher height - of leadership
and credibility - not just viewership or readership. GMA - Govern
More Authoritatively.
She assumed office on Sabado de Gloria. Will there be Ouster
Sunday? GMA - Glory Melting Away.
Big Mike slinked away to Singapore to drown his sorrows,
preferring Singapore Slings to the slings and arrows at home,
where they go over him with a fine-toothed comb.
Is GMA really big enough for the presidency? The ABS-CBN man is
waiting in the wings.
Having started public service in the garments board, is the
vaunted doctorate just embroidery?
Guys don’t allow their dates to order pampano for dinner/ The
tasty fish would’nt be a no-no if it were pampa-yes.
Senate probes do not bring out much into the light except how
light senators who delight in the limelight really are.
With their antics and pork barrel, shouldn’t we give them both
barrels (of a double-barreled shotgun)?
If the Palace image is hazy or cloudy, don’t blame it all on the
political adviser, Gabriel Claudio.
Only Gabriel the archangel, and no other Gabriel, can make things
fly above the cloud, Joe.
Of course, the adviser is better than more eraser, but how about
as merchandiser?
Is ex-general, Exec. Sec. Eddie Ermita living proof that GMA is
beholden to generals? GMA - Generals Manipulating Administration?
Even Ermita’s nickname-sake and supposed patron, Eddie Ramos,
didn’t make him Cabinet primus interpares when he was president,
relegating him to a drawer, er, a seat, in Congress.
Has the seat become a throne or is it power behind the throne?
Ex-President Fidel Ramos is fortunate that his parents didn’t name
him Benigno instead; otherwise he wouldn’t be Eddie Ramos but `Igno
Ramos.
If the exec. sec. is a Ermita, does that make the president
simbahan? How, if the simbahan? How, if the sambahan is in
reverse? GMA - Ghost Malacañang Apparatus?
Let’s have another round and get off this merry- go-round that is
running us into the ground.
Roy Señeres is calling for the señores to mutiny. Does he thing
he’s Roy Rogers, or Buck Rogers bucking Litle Miss Philippines?
Why is there a toilet paper market when this country uses water?
But, ah, women use it for the front and that’s more often.
Ignacio Bunye, the Palace mouthpice may go down in ignominy when
he loses the ability to say his piece and remain in one piece.
An engineer, then Sen. John Osmeña engineered the unjustified
P150-M cut in the University of the Phils. budget to spite his
nemesis, then UP Pres. Nemenzo, in 2001.
The cut hasn’t been restored up to now and UP is down and
suffering. Aren’t they glad he was not restored to the senate?
Though his body was restored after the Plaza Miranda bombing, they
wonder about his head.
Now, he’s engineering the partition of Cebu into four provinces to
spite other enemies. Spite without respite. Shouldn’t Osmeña be
consigned to history’s smelly john?
Corpus and Yorac have left the government in disgust. Who’s left
that we can trust?
Left-wing congressman include Crispy Bill-tran and Teodoro (de
inodoro?) Cashino who railed against pork barrel during the
campaign and are now suspected of funneling those funds to the
CCP-NPA.
From `possums to porkers, and they’re pigging out as they ham it
up.
There are no more gays in the Senate (one was accused of raping a
male prostitute in Tagaytay, Cavite), but oh my tatay, we have the
showbiz goys from Cavite, San Juan and Pampanga.
When will Ping Lacson and Pong Biazon collaborate on a Ping-Pong
Bill? If they go ballroom, it would be a Ping-Pong Ball.
Being Speaker, JDV is never speechless, but eyebags say he often
is sleepless keeping the Gatasan Boys of Batasan Hills happy in
the Rainbow Coalition with its pots of gold.
Joe the Venetian, what a magician.
Was it Toynbee who said, “.. absolute power corrupts absolutely”?
Absolute doesn’t mean absuelto but that is what the powerful get
in this banana republic, Pilipitnas.
Headline Review:
“GMA orders all-out war on jueteng” - If this ain’t just damage
control after the expose, Jo-say, we’ll get us the big fish. Even
Little Miss Moppet, the Bush puppet, knows at least one... But are
crackdowns on jueteng only on orders from above?
“Pampanga mayors want to legalize jueteng” - The Pampanga mayors
league is headed by the neophyte mayor of Lubao, son of the
supposed jueteng king. Such clout to rout other mayors! Are they
all in league?
“Mishap victim’s parents to sue hospital officials” - 19-year-old
Gena Pabun died after an accident because the Laguna Provincial
Hospital wouldn’t admit her, since being from Cavite, she had no
relative to watch over her! Dang, such dung should be hung!
Potshots Glossary:
DILG - Dumb & Insensate on Lords of Gambling
DOT - Durano’s Offerings to Tourists
NAIA - Nation Ashamed of Its Airport
PIATCO - Public Incensed At Tampering of Contracts & Obligations
DOJ - Defenders of Jueteng?
DOF - Despondent Over (national) Finances
EDSA - Expectations Dashed to Shrede Always
PCGG - Political Connections Get the Gravy
PCGC - Poor Chasers of Grafters & Criminals
PNP - Pretending No Payola
Did performance ebb when Ebdane was PNP chief? Was it all apple
pie with Aglipay? With Lomibao, can they all take a bow, or is it
just all lomi?
When will we all repent and reform? No matter how many photos of
us in church get to the front pages, we won’t make it to the main
event in Heaven after this pre-life on Earth unless we do,
whatever our religion. Religion alone won’t get us there.
Religion divides people. Witness Muslim vs. Jew, or Christian, or
Hindu; Catholic versus Protestant; Sunni vs.Shiite.
Only spirituality unites. The sad fact is that we Christians are
mostly Sunday Christians, or worse, Christians only when in church
or praying for heavenly favors.
Here’s something to chew on: Mahatma Ghandi once said, “I would
have been a Christian, if not for Christians.”
For comments and non-violent reactions, txt 0915-949-7638. No
violent reactions, please. We’re already an endangered species.
